Reflections

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  1. Cathie

    From my family relationships, I have learned to love the broken.
    We are all in our human condition, so we are all broken, imperfect in some way.
    Yet, sometimes the brokenness is so severe that a separation must take place, for the health of all, but love continues.
    I have learned to accept and love myself and others, in our human condition and not try to be perfect.
    Oh and we cannot “fix” others. We can only work within ourselves while loving ourself and others.

    2 years ago
  2. Javier Visionquest

    Everything I’ve ever learned has come through some sort of relationship. How did it require another person to introduce me to my own heart? I dunno but they did and I experienced genuine salvation! I am exceedingly grateful for those who have given me another chance for there is where I have truly grown as a human being.

    2 years ago
  3. Alli Rouselle

    If someone wants to leave dont try and keep them with you because clearly you dont mean enough to them to stay so why put youself in a situation no one can get you out of because you wouldnt let them leave it may hurt for the time being but it will be better

    2 years ago
  4. O.Christina

    For me the most important lesson is that friendship is built on trust and love and that I may rely on this in the chosen dear friends as well as in me. For this I am deeply grateful.

    2 years ago
  5. Robin Ann

    There are 5 love languages ( Primary and secondary love languages) They will feel most loved when they have: 1. Words of affirmation 2. Quality time, 3. Acts of service, 4.. Gifts and 5. Physical Touch. Relationships thrive when you know someone else’s love language

    2 years ago
  6. Linda

    People don’t always act the way I want or expect them to. Acceptance of this fact is a hard but worthwhile lesson.

    2 years ago
  7. Erich617

    If you are reading my posts lately, you might have noticed issues with relationships, so this question is a little pointed for me.

    I was actually considering calling a close family member to talk because I have a lot on my mind that I’d like to process. That said, I am also having a lot of trouble with this family member because of some particular, very persistent behaviors of theirs that are putting a major strain on the relationship. (Anybody who wants more details can ask, and I will send a private message of some sort.) And I am seeing something similar in other relationships.

    I had a therapist who said, “Your relationships feel like deserts to you. You want rain so badly that, when you get a sprinkle, you respond, ‘But I wanted a monsoon!'”

    I know that I get a tremendous amount from my relationships with others, and I work to cultivate those. At the same time, perhaps I need to understand that nobody will meet all my needs entirely, just as I will not meet others’ needs entirely, and accept what I do get from each relationship gratefully.

    2 years ago
  8. Don Jones

    The best place for the past is the past. Today is for those who are here now.

    2 years ago
  9. Carol

    What are some lessons I have learned from my relationships?
    Several years ago I worked on a retreat team and our spiritual director use to say, “There is nothing more real than a relationship.” I found that saying troublesome. What did he mean? I have come to the conclusion that he was attempting to plant a seed of awareness in us. He wanted us to realize that we are in a physical, mental, emotional and spiritual relationship with our concept of a higher power, with our planet, with each other and with ourselves. In my life, sometimes these relationships have been healthy and sometimes they have not but the opportunity to learn and grow is always there. Poet, playwright, and author James Baldwin said, “People can’t, unhappily, invent their mooring posts, their lovers and their friends, anymore than they can invent their parents. Life gives these and also takes them away and the great difficulty is to say Yes to life…You have to go the way your blood beats. If you don’t live the only life you have, you won’t live some other life, you won’t live any life at all.” I think my biggest lesson has been to learn to trust and value my life. I’ve learned that if I can remain patient with life, it will show me a constructive way to proceed. Sometimes, the answer comes directly into my brain; sometimes it comes through another human being; sometimes it comes through the natural world (especially when I can remember that I to am part of the natural world; and many times it comes from the willingness to be a participant observer. I allow a piece of me to step back and watch. It helps me own my thoughts, feelings and actions. I’m very fond of the word, Lord. It’s my personification of this trust I have nurtured. When I traced the etymology of the word, “Lord,” I learned that the Lord was the bread giver, the one who offered sustenance to the people and so my prayers for wisdom often begin with the word, “Lord.” Also, in my experience, the saying: “When the student is ready, the teacher appears” comes to mind. Sometimes it is a fellow human, sometimes it is a book or a poem, sometimes it seems like an arid wasteland. Whatever I need to wake up a little more fully is given when I say Yes to life. When I am willing to have eyes to see and ears to hear, I experience healing. All of this said, I am very aware that I do not do anything alone. It is all about relating, re-al-izing, honoring my relationships.

    2 years ago
  10. Barb C

    Such a huge question to start the day with! Let’s see….
    I can make bad choices and recover from them.
    I can only manage my own thoughts and feelings, not those of others no matter how much I want to.
    Charm goes stale; being responsible and following through doesn’t.
    Everyone has a story. You’re part of their story just as they’re part of yours. How do I want to be remembered when they tell this story?
    People can and do change.
    It’s never wrong to be kind.

    2 years ago
    1. Joseph McCann

      A huge question and such an insightful reply. I especially like “Charm goes stale; being responsible and following through doesn’t.” I can frame the beginning a few ways.
      Thank you Barb.

      2 years ago
  11. c
    carol

    Attachments , aversions, perceptions, variations in the notions of what love does, everyone has suffered trauma, fear can dictate both desirable and undesirable behaviours, discriminatory practices are conditioned and justified, the conditioned response is veiled as true or real until a veil is lifted… everyone is on their own path

    2 years ago
  12. Helly

    Be kind.

    2 years ago
  13. Charlie T

    I am learning to be as open as possible. Holding thoughts and feelings in, will eventually be unbearable. Pushing back on the fear and insecurities has allowed my relationships to deepen and evolve. I have also Learned that connection is importing me. Possibly the most important thing in my life. I am grateful for all of my relationships. They have taught me so much.

    2 years ago
  14. EJP

    Patience is a virtue.

    2 years ago
  15. Avril

    That’s a tough question. I’m still learning them. My best girlfriend’s teach me vulnerability and how to be a safe space. My children teach me patience and to remain creative. Sometimes, I wish I didn’t have to learn the patience over and over again 😉. My husband teaches me calmness and care. Not to mention, the lessons my Spiritual Teachers impart about the realms of consciousness.

    2 years ago
  16. Nannette

    From my relationships I have learned that others can hurt you deeper that I would ever think…some hurt to destroy…but why? Then I learned that another relationship brought me the love and trust that I never believed would happen…that a person could love that much. I learned that you never forget a mother’s love…and how Blessed if you have experienced that love. Some relationships are there for awhile…for as long as needed and then they leave. Life is ever changing and the people in our lives change as well…We learn something from every interaction and encounter…sometimes good and sometimes not so good…But…as Kevin pointed out in his posting – we must do the right thing…even if others do not . The relationships here are important…and they are relationships. I continue to learn from all of you every day. God Bless and Thank You.

    2 years ago
  17. Rabbit

    You can start again.
    Forgive others and .yourself.
    Relationships change.
    Relationships are fragile and they can be effected by the times.
    Sometimes you get help from the people and relationships that you would not have suspected would be there for you.
    I think we have relationships on this site and we are all teaching each other many valuable and caring lessons. Thank you.
    Happy Halloween. 🎃👻🐇 That last one could be my costume.

    2 years ago
  18. Butterfly

    I have learnt to let people in and out of my life without clinging. We are all evolving and changing and certain people have come into my life, as a friend or a partner, at the time that was right for them and me. Each of us learnt lessons, sometimes very painful lessons. Those were the life lessons we needed to learn. The lessons that test our resilience to it’s limit. Others have been a support at a time when it was needed and then moved on. My 3 children are my rocks. They are in their 40s and 50s now. We are always there for each other. The love there runs very deep and I am truely grateful for them and the lessons I have learnt in this lifetime.

    2 years ago
  19. Joseph McCann

    To be fully present when in conversation, listen, do not try to fix, and only offer advice when asked. Think a moment before I speak.

    2 years ago
    1. Rabbit

      All good advice Joseph. I read in a book, “The most important thing you can do to show someone you love them is to pay attention.”

      2 years ago
  20. Laura

    I learned that I was too trusting in some relationships, not trusting enough in others. I’m grateful for the people who have stuck with me as I continue to make this human journey.

    2 years ago
  21. Michele

    The people you love and trust will hurt and betray you. Dig deep and find inner strength. Always be grateful.
    Happy Halloween everyone!🎃👻🧙🏻‍♀️

    2 years ago
  22. sunnypatti48317

    So many life lessons on love, boundaries, trust, and anything else you can think of! I have learned that I will always look for the good, and I’m grateful for that. And I have learned that loving myself and taking care of myself helps all of my other relationships be the best they can be.

    2 years ago
  23. Antoinette

    I have learned that everything is impermanent. We want to make things permanent and that’s not the true nature of reality. I’m grateful for impermanence, because without it nothing would be possible! Thank you. .

    2 years ago
    1. Joseph McCann

      Good morning Antoinette, “Impermanence is both a process of continual loss, in which things exist and disappear and it is also a process of continuous rebirth or creativity in which things that do not exist suddenly appear.” Joseph Goldstein One of my favorite description of impermanence.

      2 years ago
  24. Kevin

    The following says it better than I could:

    People are often unreasonable, illogical and self-centered. Forgive them anyway.
    If you are kind, people may accuse you of selfish, ulterior motives. Be kind anyway.
    If you are successful, you will win false friends and true enemies. Succeed anyway.
    If you are honest and frank, people may cheat you. Be honest and frank anyway.
    What you spend years building, someone could destroy overnight. Build anyway.
    If you find serenity and happiness, people may be jealous. Be happy anyway.
    The good you do today, people will often forget tomorrow. Do good anyway.
    Give the world the best you have, and it may never be enough. Give the world the best you’ve got anyway.
    You see, in the final analysis, it is between you and God. It was never between you and them, anyway.

    -Dr. Kent M. Keith (but often attributed to Mother Teresa)

    2 years ago
    1. Rabbit

      Thanks Kevin. This is encouraging in good and bad times. I found both versions. Here is a link: https://www.prayerfoundation.org/mother_teresa_do_it_anyway.htm

      2 years ago
    2. Antoinette

      Do everything with a grateful mind and let go! Thanks 🙏 happy Halloween 🎃

      2 years ago

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