What new experience of myself am I having?

There is a new awareness of something that may have been developing over time. It is a contradiction I seem to be holding, an inner both/and. I am both meek and fierce. Not a compromise between the two, or a middling. Both fully, at the same time. By meek I mean I am self effacing, unobtrusive, willing to serve quietly and unacknowledged (seem to prefer it that way). And when called upon, able to fight for a noble cause as a worthy opponent. This later is a recent awareness. Lest you think I am getting into street fights (I am not) I will provide an example. The determination to complete my recent row. It was a fierce battle between my will, and my word. My word won. I also regularly support lost causes. So as to stand beside those fighting the losing battle. Because the fight for right cannot be based on the odds of winning. We are doomed if a few of us don’t ignore the odds and pitch that fight. Now some might lament my use of the word fight, so perhaps replace it with the word struggle. But make no mistake, for me it is a fight. Ask anyone on the front lines with an illness, or injustice, or abuse.