Reflections

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  1. Malag

    I had to look up a definition. It’s not a word I use. Def included “devoted determined and enthusiastic” and “complete earnest commitment”. On that basis rarely do I wish I was more wholehearted in situations. I prefer a bit more balance.

    3 years ago
  2. Hot Sauce

    Lately, I’ve been so focused on school, I’ve kind of gotten out of my running habits. I might change that by committing to run everyday. If that means some things get turned in a day or two late, then so be it. I really want to prioritize self-care.

    3 years ago
  3. d
    delilah

    almost everyday, i really want to feel for people and care but its hard for me. i can dose off even when someone is having a face to face conversation with me because i find it hard to care. i really hate that about myself but noticing that i do this is my first step to changing that.

    3 years ago
  4. Melissa

    When someone just finds out they have a bad disease or someone dies that is important to them. I chicken out for a moment and wonder what I should say to show I support them and I am there for them. I just need to take a deep breath in my heart and mind and just push aside my worries ,if I will say the correct thing. Speak from my inner soul with more courage to listen and how to move forward to help that person. So I guess I leave my body and mind for a moment . So in the future I would like to just be present with them, have courage right then to be there for them.

    3 years ago
  5. Don Jones

    I feel, the energy flows where my attention goes. So, if I am feeling halfhearted, it means for me that I am not giving my full attention. So, I give it completely. Paying attention is so important otherwise I will probably just be somewhere else..

    3 years ago
  6. Cathie

    At times I suppose…but usually if so, it is due to the physical challenges encroaching on the experience.
    Though I cannot change the physical, becoming aware of the encroachment will help redirect my energy to be more fully present!

    3 years ago
  7. John Tamminga

    One phrase that Br. David uses in his teachings is, “how may I serve?” Contemplating the meaning behind it has helped me with the motivation “to bless” and wholeheartedly indirectly happens more easily.

    3 years ago
  8. Toni

    Yes, yesterday I attended a seminar on line and I just listened and gave no input and did not ask questions. My one question was answered. It was the last question of the session. I was disappointed in myself for not participating more fully. Next time, I will ask questions and be more present.

    3 years ago
  9. Carol

    As I read everyone’s posts, I’m reminded of an old episode of “MASH.” It’s Christmas time in the camp and everyone is gathered in the mess tent. Boxes are Christmas decorations sit on one of the cafeteria tables but everyone is gloomy, feeling lonely, missing home and family. No one wishes to decorate. Colonel Potter walks in and surveys the situation and he says, “If you ain’t where you’re at, you’re no where.” I find that sound advice. To be wholehearted is not about performance. It’s about presence. Some days we trudge. We can’t always skip, hop and jump and it’s okay. We can still be instruments of the grace that like our very breath is flowing effortlessly in the present moment. Life is now and the key is presence. Don’t fight, don’t flee, don’t freeze, just let it flow and be sure to give yourself a wholehearted hug today.

    3 years ago
    1. Holly in Ohio

      I felt like you were speaking to me, Carol, because I guess it is just what I need to hear. What you said is quite beautiful. It has layers to it, about acceptance, peace, kindness to our self…

      You have given me much to think about. Thank you.

      3 years ago
      1. Carol

        Holly, Big hug coming your way!

        3 years ago
        1. Holly in Ohio

          Awh, Carol, thank you! Big hug coming back. It truly feels good to know you are here, and others, too.

          3 years ago
    2. Trish

      Wonderful post, Carol🙂

      3 years ago
      1. Carol

        Thanks, Trish

        3 years ago
  10. Mike S

    I feel many times I’ve taken the safe or easy way out and have treated comfort for a more expensive life. Perhaps I have gone with the flow when I should’ve taken a stand against something but really didn’t feel right. In the Future with matters of consequence, I can be more diligent in holding to the truth but I know.

    3 years ago
  11. Gecko

    It varies depending on the demands of my day, especially with work related emergencies. I notice it is definitely tied into the level of energy I have at any given moment. And there is a turning back and turning inward as the pandemic goes on and on, to say nothing of the trauma all of us have in my town from the mass shooting. I guess all of this really has me feeling disconnected from me, and that I am simply like an organic machine remotely doing my tasks.

    3 years ago
  12. SK

    There are times when I feel less than there in the moment. My focus and energies seem to be elsewhere.

    3 years ago
  13. Patricia

    I’m showing up less wholeheartedly to this question and time on Gratefulness.org this morning. I have too much going on and have already had my personal quiet reflection, prayer and writing time. I guess each day has its priorities and some days I have to say “I choose to spend my whole heart on these other things today…”

    3 years ago
  14. Holly in Ohio

    Yes. Right now, I’m not “all-in” with the farm and other projects. I don’t seem to have a lot of confidence or follow-through or even self-start, and I usually have that. I seemed to do fine last year with the shutdown and changes, despite the strain most people felt with the pandemic situation. I just “got on with it” last year, but this winter I think the Covid-world finally started catching up with me and I started slowing down as a reaction. Then a few weeks ago, something triggered my nightmares to return each night, so now I’m not sleeping well, either. I don’t feel depressed, but I seem to be doing a good impression of it.
    So, I’m pushing myself a bit to keep moving, half-heartedly doing my work, to get at least something done each day, but I’m very late on my sowing dates and other self-chosen projects, struck with indecisiveness each day, and not getting a lot done. This is so unlike me. I also wasn’t talking much for a while, except here. Even to my kids – so that was bad. Trying to make an effort now. I have been aware of this ennui and trying to figure out how to get things to shift… but I’m stumped how to change this because I don’t really understand why it came in. I welcome suggestions of things to try to get movement again!

    Thanks for putting up with my whining this morning. I know I’m really so lucky, I’m not having to face what so many of you must deal with on a daily basis (healing, illness, loss of a loved one, etc.), so I feel like I really should not complain. But I would appreciate advice. Thanks.

    3 years ago
    1. Michele

      Was the losing of the books what triggered the nightmares? I remember you mentioned you found the bag they were in. You can try a relaxation meditation before you go to bed. Ask your husband to give you a massage before bed. Sending you some peace and calmness:)

      3 years ago
      1. Holly in Ohio

        It was not, Michele. I’m not certain, but I think the nightmares started upon hearing my daughter has again chosen an unhealthy relationship. My husband and I want to talk with her about it, and we’re not sure, but we think she may be dodging us for the moment. She let us know in a long email where she tried to explain everything was all right because they were in love. We’re pretty sure she knows the relationship isn’t right, because she’s been keeping it completely secret for quite a while (this only came up because we needed her house number), and she’s been keeping it secret that she’s been living with him for some time and not living where we thought she was. She’s trying to justify the relationship… but keeping it secret, too. I think the nightmares came because I know this is beyond my control, but I know she’s in need of psychological help.

        Wouldn’t I love it if my husband would give me a massage? Lol. But the meditation is something I could do. I have a nice guided meditation tape that I could play, and I have been massaging my own feet with lotion and that feels good. I take it you have some experience with nightmares, too. I’m so sorry. I found the books, by the way!

        3 years ago
    2. Christine

      Dear Holly, I feel sympathy for you. 💞I also had to push myself forward after my husband passed away. Please do this “pushing” as kind and sweet as possible to yourself.

      3 years ago
      1. Holly in Ohio

        Thank you, Christine!

        3 years ago
    3. Mica

      You’re facing more than I am, Holly in Ohio – no need to apologize [to me] 😊

      3 years ago
      1. Holly in Ohio

        Aw, thank you.

        3 years ago
    4. Rita

      I have no advice Holly but I certainly hear you. My choice of words is ‘funk’. And I’ve been there lately. I attribute it to fatigue -it’s been a year of shut down and my spirit wants change. It’s a hard place to be in but I accept it as a phase of the times, part of me I don’t like, one more part of me I dislike but believe that this too shall pass. I read somewhere that the Dali Lama says to put a smile on your face even when you don’t feel it, fake it till you make it. Some days my smile is real and some days it’s a fake. Sending blessings and good energy – Rita.

      3 years ago
      1. Holly in Ohio

        Thank you, Rita. I’m overwhelmed by the kindness of everyone. Thank you so much!

        3 years ago
      2. Mica

        Thanks, Rita, for reminding me of the Dalai Lama and his smile 😉

        3 years ago
  15. Javier Visionquest

    Showing up wholeheartedly not a problem.
    Showing up with a <less-than pancreas, though. . .

    3 years ago
  16. devy

    To be wholehearted in everything one days is difficult. We are human. There are so many distractions both positive and negative that interfere with this idea. By my continued training and work on daily meditation, thankfulness and making a conscious effort eventually being wholehearted in everything may become a final destination.

    3 years ago
  17. Trish

    For sure there are times when I show up in a distracted state. There’s an element of holiness when we give our undivided attention to someone or something. It brings richness to the entire experience. Striving for those experiences keeps me on my toes.

    3 years ago
  18. sunnypatti48317

    Oh, for sure there are! I am but a human, so while I always want to be my best, I’m just not always 100% into something. I find this happens in conversation with others sometimes. And I notice it. I see myself drifting away from being present with another, and then I redirect myself to pay attention. That’s the best I can do. Noticing helps keep me aware and reminds me that I still have – and will always have – work to while I am in this body.

    3 years ago
  19. Howie Geib

    I am struggling through the documentary “Exterminate All the Brutes” on HBO. I could hardly sleep last night. It, along with my deeply held opinions about our destruction of the planet, has truly shaken me. I am not convinced I know if there is a direct correlation from my feelings and some direct action. Knowing on the visceral level that I do thanks to the film, I cannot fathom something won’t shift. Precisely I am not sure though. Knowing something intellectually is one thing, really getting it, and seeing its perpetuation in our lives today, is terrifying.

    3 years ago
    1. M
      Matthew E

      Dear Howie, I have read a few of your reflections and I can tell you are a very mindful person. The case that is presented first always seems right until it is cross examined. Your fear may be well founded, but it is also possible that it is not when it is held up against cross examination. I pray your soul would find peace my friend.

      3 years ago
  20. Michele

    Physical tiredness definitely has an impact. Trying to get a good nights sleep, exercising more, quiet time/mediation all can help your mental status to be sharper/clearer so that you’re able to give wholeheartedly to whatever. Body, mind, spirit all working together:)

    3 years ago
  21. Kevin

    Today’s question assumes that one should always want to “show up” to do, say, or participate in something whole heartedly. I will ague that sometimes this is a sign that I shouldn’t have shown up in the first place! Everything in life doesn’t need to be 100% “all in,” and full throttle. Some things we just “do” to get them done, period. Sometimes it’s okay to stockpile our interests and desires and expend them fully, when the moment arrives, onto pursuits that we are truly passionate about.

    3 years ago
  22. Antoinette

    Yes absolutely! I can change this by changing my mind!
    It’s spring so the time is now to clean house !
    There is a quote from the Buddha upon his enlightenment: “O house-builder! You are seen.
    You shall build no house again.
    All your rafters are broken.
    Your ridgepole is shattered.”
    A mantra by zen master Thay is also useful to remember: “I have arrived. I am home in the here and in now.”
    Letting go, I can arrive wholeheartedly.
    I’m grateful for this wonderful question.

    3 years ago
  23. Dusty Su

    Being forced back to Australia because of COVID after a 40 year absence. It’s killing me, but I am praying for resurrection and growth out the daily little to large personal deaths—and I am seeing good coming from the bad from my showing up as best I can. MInd you, I lowered the bar and decided I did not have to LOVE Australia, liking it and being grateful are a good enough set of goals.

    3 years ago
    1. Michele

      Once you’re vaccinated, can you go back to Thailand (or wherever you wanted to go?)

      3 years ago
      1. Dusty Su

        Not that easy. We were all supposed to be vaccinated by end of Sept. Now rumor of not until the second quarter of next year. They keep changing it. Plus, we still cannot leave Australia—government won’t allow it unless some very serious and expensive reason to go. I have lost my long-term visa for Thailand by being away. Other possibilities are abundant, but not forthcoming because of COVID. I wait and cry, yet do my best, trust, find purpose and carry on.

        3 years ago
        1. Michele

          I’m sorry to hear this. Virtual hug to you. I admire your positivity:) Hopefully you’ll get your vaccine sooner than later and your government will begin lifting its restrictions.

          3 years ago
          1. Dusty Su

            Thank you, yes thats a good thing to hope for. Hugs back dear heart 💑

            3 years ago
        2. Holly in Ohio

          Dusty Su, I’m so sorry. I didn’t realize people have lost their “home” countries over Covid restrictions, but of course people have. I hope this unexpected kink in your life will bring some equally unexpected joys. I hear Australia and NZ are opening up travel between them… will this help?

          3 years ago
          1. Dusty Su

            Sadly, no… but time will bring changes and new life. I believe ultimately something better, as you say, joy greater than the loss. Perhaps something I could not have imagined if life had stayed as it had been. It will be well with me and for many others. I am grateful. Thank you for your kind words.

            3 years ago

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