Reflections

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  1. Sandra

    Simply being in this community is offering me so many new perspectives. I am so grateful for that. Outside of that the experience of supporting my parents in the final chapters of their lives continues to enrich and expand my perspective of life and of dying. A privilege to witness ๐Ÿ™

    3 years ago
  2. Elaine

    Meeting young climate justice activists is giving me a new and more hopeful perspective on the future. Perhaps a mass correction of values from extraction to regeneration is possible.

    3 years ago
  3. Heather

    Struggling to help my students and their parents to grasp new curriculum. I empathize with frustration and try to use a growth mindset to show that there is more than one way to solve a problem.

    3 years ago
  4. d
    db82258

    Intergrate all that I am.

    3 years ago
  5. Mica

    I feel like I’m in a science fiction story – we had a bit of rain last night – the first rain of the year – and supposedly this makes it obvious that we are now in the midst of a big power outage. Is this a taste of things to come?

    3 years ago
  6. Hot Sauce

    Having recently joined Reddit, I was offered a new perspective on how white people selling goods that come from other cultures without partnering with people from those cultures can be harmful-namely, people will be more likely to buy from the white sellers of those items than from those of the original culture, so that those who sell who are from the marginalized culture end up making less money off their products. Reddit is actually a really good platform for learning about complicated topics that are often difficult to understand.

    3 years ago
    1. Holly in Ohio

      Thank you, Hot Sauce. I was just trying to convince my brother of this, and yes, the issue is very complex. I have been examining it more from the, “Into whose pocket does most of the money go, and are they already a rich cat?” perspective. He’s been thinking more simply, that the U.S. is wealthy, therefore all imports are good, and I’m thinking, why do we have to buy most of our things from the only country with a larger carbon footprint than the U.S. has and a very poor social justice record? Sigh. I am so glad you, Mica, and others have your eye on these inequities. I will be grateful to know from you any insights you get for getting around these inequities. Thank you. โค

      3 years ago
    2. Mica

      Thank you, Hot Sauce – that makes sense, and I’ll try to remember and behave accordingly. When I went to Ghana to visit a small non-profit, we were collecting books from the USA for the kids. Actually, they liked local books that I bought in Ghana much more than the donated books.

      3 years ago
  7. Don Jones

    How time can be life’s fabric softener. Hard positions, hard borders, hard fear, hard unyielding views, hard times … they all soften with the addition of time.

    3 years ago
    1. Michele

      ‘time can be life’s fabric softener’ – definitely a keeper:)

      3 years ago
    2. Mica

      That’s a good one, Don – time can be life’s fabric softener. I think I’ll save it to my gratefulness doc

      3 years ago
  8. devy

    Mโ€™y spouse and I have been difficulties over the past several months to the point of not knowing what is going to happen to our relationship. After taking a week holiday travelling together and once we got back home, we had a discussion about what she is looking for in her life. It was presented that she had changed and needed more time alone, to be more independent. I also realized that I need to do the same. Since then, our weekends involve doing our own things. We do spend some time together but a lot less. What Iโ€™ve realized is that my wife is happier and we seem to have less friction between us and get along better. A definite new perspective about me time and how itโ€™s healthier for us as indIviduals and a couple. Our relationship is still up in the air but at least if things donโ€™t workout at least we have ourselves…

    3 years ago
    1. Holly in Ohio

      I wish the two of you the best, Devy.

      3 years ago
    2. Mica

      That’s wonderful news, devy – that certainly would have helped me in my marriage, to have more freedom to do and be as I wished. Good luck and warm wishes to you both ๐Ÿ’

      3 years ago
  9. d
    dcdeb

    Being confined with not much to do for the weekend. I found myself viewing a streamed religious program with my ex. I can’t say that i enjoyed it.

    3 years ago
    1. Holly in Ohio

      This made me chuckle. You were willing to try new things. Not all new things will be our cup of tea. ๐Ÿ™‚

      3 years ago
  10. Melissa

    Learning to accept change in all things. Looking at everything more deeply now. Yesterday all day Monarch butterflies flew by. Every five minutes or so two to three. They have been absent these last few years. Maybe just one or two. It made me so happy to see them. I don’t know why for one day so many flew by. Wow I am grateful.

    3 years ago
    1. Pilgrim

      It is the season when many Monarchs begin to gather in Mexico. Perhaps you are on their path!

      3 years ago
  11. B
    BuddyMax

    Having issues with my spouse and depression are making think of all the many other things I have to be grateful for; I Googled “gratitude journal” and found this site today. I’m hoping the prespective I get from this will help with both issues.

    3 years ago
    1. Holly in Ohio

      Welcome! I hope we see more of you.
      For me, gratitude has made all things easier.

      3 years ago
    2. Michele

      Welcome BuddyMax – this is a wonderful site.

      3 years ago
    3. Mica

      Welcome, BuddyMax! Many of us find this to be a wonderful site ๐Ÿค—

      3 years ago
  12. Linda

    As I age, I notice the small things that have gotten harder to do–like walking up a steep hill. I used to do that all the time with barely a lost breath. Now I usually have to stop at least once on the way up. A bit humbling for me. I don’t see myself as “old” but at 66, I guess it is upon me!

    3 years ago
    1. Holly in Ohio

      Three years ago, Linda, I was huffing and puffing my way up a “hill” in Scotland (a mini-mountain). I felt old until two older ladies near their 80s passed us, going at twice our speed!

      Inwardly cursing, I realized they were young because they were doing this nearly every day. Lol.
      Good luck, Linda. Don’t stop. โค

      3 years ago
      1. Linda

        Yes!!

        3 years ago
    2. Mica

      I’m happy to discover, Linda, that some of these problems come and go for me. May that be so, for you as well ๐Ÿ˜˜

      3 years ago
  13. Kim

    My immediate response was “finding this website”…I have found myself returning to the content as I puttered this weekend…and each time a profound focus on the moment occurred. For this I am grateful.

    3 years ago
    1. Michele

      Welcome Kim:)

      3 years ago
    2. Mica

      Welcome, Kim! ๐Ÿ˜Š๐Ÿ’

      3 years ago
  14. Holly in Ohio

    The whole concept of “abundance” has shifted for me over my lifetime, but particularly in the last year, in practicing gratitude and in shifting for a simpler life.

    3 years ago
  15. Elaine Patricia

    Not the best health news means I must gain new perspective. I am using the Stop Look Go method and it is helping me make wiser choices.

    3 years ago
  16. Mary Pat

    Wow…what a dandy question for today. Having Covid-either the delta or mu variants-we won’t be told until much later-has opened my eyes to a new perspective. I have always been the one who took the meals, ran errands, did all the chores for those who were ill. Now I am the one who is ill and I see the difference. It is very hard for me to accept help…dog walkers so we don’t have to, meals brought to us as well as people just dropping off snacks and such and putting them in the cooler on our porch with a note. saying things like….heal quickly, recovery is on the way, we love you….honest. It is very touching.. I really didn’t think when I did this for others it made a dent…but it does! It really has helped tremendously. I think the kind words help as much as the food. !!!!!NOTHING helps as much as the dog walking!!!!!
    I am trying to relax in this new way, but it is hard to let people take care of you….it is a gift to be able to do that…..These experiences of love and caring are showing me what I never knew before….that it is OK to not be the one taking care of someone else….that in my illness I am a person others genuinely care about, and not just a project if sorts….hard to put into words…..

    3 years ago
    1. Dusty Su

      Ooh, yes, now that is perspective changing for sure. Bless you, dear soul, hope you find great joy in renewed health. I am glad you are loved and cared for.

      3 years ago
    2. O.Christina

      My dear friend, wishing you to joyfully relax into the temporary state of illness and being so lovingly cared for and looked after, while lying in your bed and slowly feeling the strength coming back. I imagine seeing a little ambivalent smile on your face about this kind of uncomfortable situation changing to joy again, which may bring back the spark in your eyes, which I imagine might usually be with you when being the one who cares for others. I can relate so much how difficult it is to accept and to experience these things from the other side when having had a similar situation during the pandemic. From all my heart, may full recovery be with you soon, dear Mary Pat.

      3 years ago
    3. A
      ALICIA

      I wish you well. I am so glad you have people looking in and helping.

      3 years ago
    4. Holly in Ohio

      I’ve been thinking of you, Mary Pat. I’m encouraged that you seem to be at that stage where you are still sick but improved, and impatient to be well. It will come in its own time. You are quite right, this is a new experience for you. I know this is kind of twisted, but you might as well enjoy the small perks while you have them! You can be queen in your bed. ๐Ÿ˜Š Sending love to you, friend! ๐Ÿงก๐Ÿ’›๐Ÿ’š

      3 years ago
      1. Mary Pat

        OH! glad you responded…I lit a candle today for you as well. It just kind of….happened….so there you go.

        3 years ago
    5. Elaine Patricia

      Thank you I really needed to read this today. I have to stop taking care of other people and let them help me also but I am finding it difficult.

      3 years ago
  17. Maurice Frank

    One of my close friends is moving out of town soon, and I will miss getting together in person every week. I will need to establish a new long distance connection with him. I already do that with another old friend, so I feel confident it can work.

    And the time we spent in person now will open up new possibilities that I must be alert to.

    3 years ago
  18. Cintia

    Different projects in my job, new experiences and the people I have meeting because of this.

    3 years ago
    1. Anna

      This is a strange circumstance dear Cintia, I would have said right right same things, plus, my mother aging, with a little Alzheimer desease.
      We are walking together and it makes me feel a joy in my hearth, walking with Cintia!

      3 years ago
  19. Nelson

    I was recently speaking with a friend about how I donโ€™t feel compelled to move up the corporate ladder as I get older. I valued it more when I was younger. Nowadays, titles and status in the workplace donโ€™t mean much. I value other things in life the older I get, like quality time with loved ones and my health.

    3 years ago
    1. Mary Pat

      Yes, we get wise as we get older…congratulations!

      3 years ago
  20. Chester

    Iโ€™m working on starting a swim routine, which is forcing more mindfulness of breathing and physical movements – also humbling although that is not quite as new.

    3 years ago
  21. InvisibleRainbow45075

    Having teenage boys who are working towards finding their independence, my role as a mother is changing. Having places offer to publish some of my art work and writing is rewarding yet scary and makes me feel vulnerable. It gives me pause as to what it means to be an artist and the responsibilities such a role carries! Having a mother getting dementia, my role as a daughter changes in a heartbreaking yet willing way. So many things to adjust too! My view changes everyday and I have to steady myself with things that ground me like cooking and housework. And yet there are blessings in every change too. Life is an ever flowing river.

    3 years ago
    1. Holly in Ohio

      I became an “empty nester” last year, Invisible Rainbow (two boys and there is an older daughter), so I appreciate the big change you are experiencing, and probably worries, too. You can trust they are more like you than it seems right now. They will make mistakes, but have faith. Time to start finding new things for yourself to fill the space. The more we let go at this point, the sooner they come to appreciate us, and we find new footing together, more equal. Fledglings must test their wings… it is natural. Best wishes to you, gentle one. ๐ŸŒป

      3 years ago
      1. InvisibleRainbow45075

        Thank you Holly in Ohio โค

        3 years ago
  22. Marnie Jackson

    Being involved in decision making. Teaching to kids who have had a disrupted education. Being part of a team that is about bonding and fun and not about winning. Talking and experiencing diversity on a daily basis. Letting my children learn from their mistakes

    3 years ago
  23. sunnypatti48317

    Work experiences are showing me new perspectives on things, particularly as I am stepping into a Team Leader role that officially starts today. Who I can trust. Who I should not. Who really gives 100% and who dumps tasks onto others because they do not want to do it, nor do they know how although they should. A lot was just a few days ago added to my plate, as they basically want me to run my old department and my new one. I’m so nice that I said yes, but I need to stand up for myself and for my new role. It’s not fair to me nor to either team.

    3 years ago
    1. Mary Pat

      Good for you! Yes, you are right, you do need to do that. I will light a candle for courage for you today.

      3 years ago
  24. Javier Visionquest

    The electrical service was out all afternoon at the organic market along with about every other business in DelRay yesterday due to a transformer, offering a sliver of insight into what the first day of the last days of civilization might look like. Self-centered, childish behavior on display by young, educated, affluent people was unnerving and disappointing. I shudder to imagine what might happen in the event of an actual emergency.

    Iโ€™m done peopling.

    3 years ago
    1. Mica

      You and me both, Javier! I’m lucky to be at my daughter’s now, hopefully nearing the end of what would be a 24-hr power outage in my extended neighborhood. Will this become the ‘new normal’? I first heard that phrase when a friend became a father and told the guys at work that he was looking forward to things becoming normal again. They laughed and told him it was the ‘new normal.’
      Ahh – you and I are seeing it – a power outage – from different directions, but it still feels to me like a shared experience.

      3 years ago
  25. EJP

    My new role as a caregiver has opened my world to many new and challenging experiences…..all pushing me out of my comfort zone and showing me my true inner strength and courage, wisdom and knowledge.

    3 years ago
  26. Pilgrim

    Downsizing … preparing to move. Going from a 3 floor place to one. All in all, this is good news. It is a lesson in creativity, having already had a lot of furniture removed/donated. Difficult and exhausting, though, with my physical limitations. So, gratitude with a huge amount of “are you kidding me? There’s more to go through?!?” I expect I will feel lighter, mentally and emotionally, when the process is over. And happier when the move is complete and can walk to the beach!

    3 years ago
    1. Michele

      Good luck on your move and many blessings in your new home:)

      3 years ago
    2. d
      db82258

      Hi Pilgrim, I have been following the site for many years and just recently started to participate. As challenging as it will be, and it will be very challenging, your message has inspired me to unburden myself of one more unnecessary weight and set myself free. Thank you for sharing!

      3 years ago
    3. pkr

      Pilgrim, sending prayers your way for peace & tranquility to return soon. Remember to breathe, 1 day at a timeโ€ฆ.Good luck..๐Ÿ™โค๏ธ

      3 years ago
      1. Pilgrim

        Thank you, pkr!

        3 years ago
    4. Dusty Su

      It’s great when it’s done. I’m a minimalist, not extreme, and it’s such a freedom.

      3 years ago
    5. Javier Visionquest

      After the Great Housing Swindle of 2008, we moved enough times that Iโ€™ve located all the tiny images of โ€œSammy Uโ€ that are hidden in the graphics on the sides of every U-Haul moving van. My duct tape kingdom for a walk to the beach.
      Iโ€™ll throw in a horse for anything south of Hatteras along the Outer Banks.

      3 years ago
    6. sunnypatti48317

      Oh, Pilgrim, I feel you! Having moved 4 times in 4 years, I understand the exhaustion, and I can only imagine how much more so it is for your with your limitations. But… it is nice to downsize and feel that lightness come in. I wish you all the best with your upcoming move! And what a bonus that you’ll be able to walk to the beach from your new home!

      3 years ago
      1. Pilgrim

        Thank you, sunnypatti! I look forward to the finish line. And then the beach! Blessings to you.

        3 years ago
  27. Howie Geib

    I have been working (thank god) for the past month or so but in a new role as support as opposed to my habitual leadership role on a team. I have learned a great deal about my dedication to my work, my desire to excel (and compete…not always pretty) and lastly my continued need for humility. I get to take pleasure in the success of others.

    3 years ago
  28. Kevin

    Just recently, having been encouraged to believe that I would be included as a presenter within an upcoming program within my wider faith community, I discovered that I have, in fact, been bypassed without even being notified individually as such. It stings. Itโ€™s insulting and disappointing. But, what I am feeling is also teaching me humility, which is good on its own merits.

    3 years ago
    1. Mica

      Oh, Kevin, I’m sorry. Things are a bit crazy still with covid. My problem is the opposite – it turns out that I Am supposed to present a poster, but no one seems to have informed me of that. The delayed conference has been kluged together quickly and imperfectly. So be it. Warm wishes –

      3 years ago
      1. Kevin

        Thanks for your gentle words here, Mica. And, don’t you just love it when people say, “You’re just the person we need for this work,” that then comes with no further guidance?

        3 years ago
        1. Mica

          Well, I was just one of the many who submitted an abstract for a poster… Happily I kluged a poster together this morn that was better than what I would have done with more time to ponder ๐Ÿ™‚

          3 years ago
    2. Dusty Su

      Ouch, yes that’s painful. Well, if it’s any consolation, your supportive, wise spirit is highly valued here.

      3 years ago
      1. Kevin

        Thanks, Dusty Su. And for sure, I am indeed grateful for this site and the many souls who frequent it. I cannot think of a better way to begin my day! Be well my friend and best of luck with your country’s grand re-opening, hopefully post-pandemic!

        3 years ago
        1. Dusty Su

          Indeed…this site is often how I go into my evening. A wrap-up thank-you for the day and such a lovely reminder of how wonderfully supportive and kind people can be to each other.

          Cheers.

          3 years ago
    3. Maurice Frank

      Kevin, I admire the way you can feel your feelings while also finding a lesson from a painful experience. Still, it hurts and that’s real for you.

      3 years ago
      1. Kevin

        It is, it’s very real, Maurice, and thank you for know that it is!

        3 years ago
    4. Mary Pat

      Oh, this brings back memories of when my husband retired….and as wonderful as my community at church is, sometimes we older ones become….for lack of a better word, invisible. I am not sure that is the situation, but if it is, please know you are not alone out here…..

      3 years ago
      1. Kevin

        Thank you, Mary Pat. I remain grateful always that this place is here for us to share what is close to our hearts. But you know, I have long felt that it’s the “ministry of the moment,” in the quietest and unspoken of ways, that is the most meaningful of all. That’s always been my guiding “north star,” at least, more so than programs and presentations, etc.

        But you are so right, too. I founded and ran a weekend retreat program for Quaker children for twenty-six years before retiring from that program in 2013. (And from my other professional work in 2015) Today, I continue to “staff” on these retreats, with new leadership that I trained over the years, who is doing a great job, too. And I have intentionally stepped back from putting myself out there in that same arena, preferring to focus on new horizons. The part that stings the most is that I didn’t go asking to be included in an upcoming presentation….some sought me out many months ago and I responded in the affirmative. But I know too that I speak my mind and truth within my wider faith community, and I have asked questions that some within our wider leadership might prefer not to answer. So this too, I’m guessing, is a part of the puzzle as well. Or, as you say, we “older ones,”, we know where the bodies are buried!”

        3 years ago
        1. Mary Pat

          We do indeed….

          3 years ago
  29. Michele

    Having a nasty cold at the moment offers me appreciation of the human body when it is functioning properly. Switching from coffee to tea with honey is a different morning routine – hoping the honey helps my sore throat.

    3 years ago
    1. Michele

      Thank you everyone for your warm wishes, much appreciated:)

      3 years ago
    2. Dusty Su

      Ooh, hope you get well soon. Never fun.

      3 years ago
    3. Mary Pat

      I don’t want to be an alarmist, but be very aware of that cold….that is exactly how my covid symptoms started. And I had a craving for honey, because I now believe my body knew before I did….
      Here is hoping it is a cold and nothing more. May you be filled with much healing.

      3 years ago
    4. sunnypatti48317

      feel better, Michele!

      3 years ago
    5. Kevin

      And hope that you feel better, soon, Michele!

      3 years ago
  30. Antoinette

    The experience of letting go over and over allows me a new perspective. Even letting go of making new perspectives is wonderful. Iโ€™m so grateful. Thank you !

    3 years ago
    1. Sandra

      I love this idea, Antoinette! Thank you! โค๏ธ๏ธ

      (I also love the message in your avatar. So wise. So true ๐Ÿ™)

      3 years ago
  31. Dusty Su

    I don’t even know how long we’ve been in lockdown, but it is well and truly the world’s longest. Melbourne, Australia, champions. This Friday, we are coming out of it and the government promised to never have one again. I am looking forward to it, but dreading it too. I have been very busy during lockdown with hosting online programs and was longing to take a bit of a break, but now I have to enter society again. The freedom I longed for is strangely burdensome. It really is a one step at a time try to keep a balance in a whole new way of operating.

    Ha, just writing it out has calmed me, given me answers. I am in control of how much I do or donโ€™t do, and also brought a jolt of excitement at the possibilities that await.

    3 years ago
    1. Mary Pat

      I can relate to that feeling. You are wise….doing it your way will make it safe, and balanced. I have been wondering how the new living arrangement is going…hope all is well there.

      3 years ago
      1. Dusty Su

        Thanks, Mary Pat. Agreed, will hopefully do it all in a helpful manner. The new place is great. Over a month now and so much happier, safer, relaxed and a homey sense. Just need to take a break as well.

        3 years ago
    2. Kevin

      I have friends here in the US, Dusty Su, who feel the same way as you describe regarding the world opening back up and what that means for them, health safety-wise, and forcing them to yet again alter their daily routines.

      3 years ago
      1. Dusty Su

        BTW, I hope your friends are okay. Health in the US particularly is a concern for sure for those vulnerable by age, pre-existing conditions, etc. Plus, stress not a good thing.

        3 years ago
      2. Dusty Su

        Yes, I think this is a side effect of loss of regular supports and lifestyle. Huge upheavals. Ambiguous grief. Now go back to not normal, yet again. I must say that a year makes a huge difference. I’m better now than a year ago, and a year from now will be better yet no doubt. I do believe that.

        3 years ago
    3. Sandra

      Writing it out helps me too, Dusty Su ๐Ÿ˜Š Enjoy being out in the world again when lockdown finally lifts. Enjoy all those possibilities at your own pace โค๏ธ๏ธ

      3 years ago
      1. Dusty Su

        Shall do, thank you Sandra.

        3 years ago
  32. Christine

    Yesterday a friend told me he has trouble concentrating. He said he had devised an exercise program of his own; stare at the door, and think of nothing else. I thought that was so boring. When he went back home, I thought “how would I do that”.
    I would go outside, breathe fresh air, follow the breath and enjoy it. I immediately took the bull by the horns and went outside to concentrate on the breath. It felt very nice.
    I have no idea if I answered the question.๐Ÿ˜Š

    3 years ago
    1. Sandra

      I think you have, Christine ๐Ÿ˜Š Your friend’s perspective enabled you to think more deeply about your own. I am finding that is happening to me all the time in the short while I have been in this community and reading the wisdom and experiences of others here! ๐Ÿ™

      3 years ago
    2. Dusty Su

      A good answer anyway though…

      3 years ago

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